Surrogacy: from the beginning

Victoria Falcone-Pawar
Apr 21, 2021
3 min read

One of the most amazing phone calls of my life came in May of 2020. Jazmine, my husbands first cousin, called to let us know she wanted to offer to be our surrogate. She changed our lives forever. She offered to do something so self-less and amazing and it truly turned our life upside down in the best way possible. I could go on and on abut what am amazing person Jazmine is.

Obviously there was no way to know how things would turn out but we were ready to start and move forward! Our fertility clinic needed to be called, insurance companies were reached out to, lawyers were contacts (this was just something that the clinic mandates for every surrogacy journey), doctors appointments were made and we were ready to hit the ground running.

Even though we were on top of everything there are some things that just take time. And let me tell you patience is NOT something that comes naturally to me. But the wait was worth it because by mid-August contracts were signed, medical clearance was given and things were able to get going! Not sure if you have ever heard the saying, “We plan, God laughs” but I will tell you, it is SO TRUE! Jaz is the most positive, healthy, kick-ass person I have ever met and you think you will have no issues but oh boy we were wrong. Jaz contracted Lyme’s disease and we needed to wait over a month to start medications and then we were ready to go by the end of September. Unfortunately the first round of medication did not create the lining we needed for an embryo transfer. Obviously we were all upset and devastated but we were on this journey together and were not giving up. We started things again and unfortunately we were derailed by a horrific KIDNEY STONE! POOR JAZ! She was in so much pain and this damn kidney stone really threw us for a wrench but to no avail Jaz came out swinging and is truly a warrior. After another 2 months of waiting to restart we decided to change up our protocols and medication regimen for Jaz. AND IT FINALLY WORKED! Her lining was PERFECT & THICK! And we were finally able to book an Embryo Tranfer, February 2nd, 2021!

For anyone going through the surrogacy process, fertility treatments themselves or just trying to get pregnant on their own, be patient and remember to stay as calm as possible. There are so many things in life are out of our hands and there are so many things we can plan. Sometimes things happen in different ways and not in the timeframe we want them too, but it is something we need to accept and move on from. If things happened according to plan Jaz would be due in April and we didn’t even have our 1st embryo transfer until February! Never forget, we do not control these things. “We plan, God laughs.”

If you are unfamiliar with the timeline process of surrogacy here it is:

Medical Clearance

Lawyer Contracts

Fertility Clinic Clearance

Initial Scans

Fertility Treatments

Ultrasound for lining check

Embryo Transfer

---if the embryo transfer takes THEN

Pregnancy Blood Test 10 days later

2nd blood test to re-confirm 2 days later

Ultrasound for pregnancy confirmation a week later